Totally confused

Life seems puzzled sometimes. Many a time we find it very difficult to resolve a situation. I also confronted similar situation. Three year back I got married and after few months I felt a new life in me. I was not keeping well, so I left my job. Both of us & our family members were happy as from two we are going to be three soon.

There was a battle going on inside me. I was totally messed up and confused, nothing was clear to me. I had feeling that my career now come to end, my dream of being to be a successful women in my field will never be true. These thought was haunting me and I was feeling restless.
I was looking for solution but that time I was not able to see any silver lining. After discussing my concern with my husband I decided not to look for the job until our baby turns one. After his first b’day I started to look for job, even I started with it but I felt very difficult to continue, as parting with my child for 8-10 hr start haunting me & my soul. I decided to quit my job and decided to take care of my baby.
I took this decision but still I was not happy. Many times my eyes get filled with tear because of feeling that I don’t have any identity of my own; I don’t have any position of my own. Same time I am not in favor of leaving my innocent baby in crèche.
Those days I was going through depression. On one side be a mother of a sweet baby give feeling of being on top of the world and on other side feeling of doing nothing constructive lower my morale. Over a period of time I adjusted to the situation and started to keep myself engaged in some other work and start enjoying my baby’s childhood activities.
I am lucky enough that god has gifted me a cute and sweet baby and loving husband. Now I am housewife, taking care of my baby and my husband. In free time I do whatever I love to, like watching TV, writing on my blogs, preparing different recipes. Even I am planning to start something which I can carry along with my family.